‘A strong, independent woman.’

Okay so it’s nearly 12am and it’s been a while since I have plucked up a sudden ‘urge’ to write a blog post over something that makes my mind bounce and my heart flutter. When I get a sudden rush of writing inspiration, I normally get all weird inside and it’s like my thoughts run at 100 miles per hour so bare with me on this one.

Ladies, here’s a thought for you. A thought that people seem to mention all the time, but which has actually stuck with me tonight. Do not, EVER, let a man define your worth. Never. If a man is unable to cherish and appreciate you for who you are, then that’s his loss. Obviously, this applies to anyone in life, just like a man never letting a woman define his worth, but I’m talking about this in relation to something that’s been whirling round in my life.

I could’ve easily have let someone define my worth a long time ago. In fact, I touched on this in my ‘A conclusion’ post. But I am so incredibly glad that I didn’t make that mistake. And I am so incredibly glad that I am strong enough in myself to turn round and say, “You know what? That wasn’t what I needed.”

Because a person’s actions against you, does not define you. Have confidence in your own self to know what you deserve, and it should be nothing but the best.

You don’t find your worth in a man. You find your worth within yourself and then find a man who’s worthy of you. Remember that.

I feel like I’m going on a ‘women independence’ tangent right now, but I feel like this has to be reflected upon. I am so fortunate to have the mindset of independence and empowerment. To be strong enough to not let a man rule me, my life or my emotions. To know that being single can still be one of the best things. Because I don’t need anyone, and I never have. Wanting, and needing are two totally different things.

So, to whoever took me for granted, good effort. Thank you for making me feel more empowered, confident, independent and strong than I have ever felt in my life. Thank you for filling me with the courage to do better, and be better. And thank you for making me my own worth- which is certainly not shaped by your actions.

Stay fearless.

Love and happiness always,

xo, Becca


Putting yourself first

So this is going to be another one of those blog posts that are completely jumbled and is just all my emotions blurted into one rambling piece of writing while my eyes are hurting from being so tired and drained. But nevertheless, here it goes.

I recently vowed to myself that I would not settle for anything less than I deserve. I probably spend the majority of 2016 being messed about by people who simply didn’t deserve my time, effort, or even myself. I don’t care if it’s a boy, friend, cat or goldfish- I won’t expose myself to the amount of hurt that I have endured previously.

I think it’s so liberating when you finally know you’re own worth. It’s like the whole feeling of, “wow. You know what? I do deserve better.” As someone who used to beat herself up over people constantly hating her, it is the most amazing feeling knowing that I won’t settle for something I’m simply not happy with.

I am dedicating myself to me, and to the people around me whom I love and cherish the most. It’s not in a selfish way, but sometimes, that’s the most important. I say it all the time (I know!), but you are your own longest commitment. Look after yourself and your own feelings. Don’t spend your life around people who make you feel less than you should.

I guess a lot of these thoughts and feelings lead onto the subject of boys, and relationship in general. Okay we gathered, I suck at all that kind of stuff, but I’m not going to spend my time on a boy, or anyone for that matter, who won’t make the effort to come and see me. Who won’t give back as much effort as I am putting in. I have learnt the hard way that it’s just not worth it. I would rather be single than be with someone who makes me feel any less than how I should feel.

I look back at what I’ve just wrote with utter astonishment, in a good sort of way. This time last year, I would have never felt as confident in myself and what I’m worth as I do now. I am a human, and I deserve to be loved and cherished like one just as I give back. Don’t spend your time giving 100% to someone when you’re getting 50% back. Yes, i know, I did say this would be a rambled post.

Confidence in yourself is empowering and liberating and utterly amazing. Don’t ever confuse it for being vain, rather knowing you’re own worth.

Love and happiness always,

xo, Becca