You know that feeling when you reflect so deeply on people who have left your life? When you think, “did that really happen for a reason?” or, “was that really best for me?” I seem to be doing that a lot tonight, and I feel like I need to express my utter gratitude from what I’ve found.
Sometimes you don’t see the bigger picture at the time, I certainly didn’t. I just saw what I wanted, and what I THOUGHT was best for me; WHO I thought was best for me. But sometimes, that isn’t the case. Sometimes, those who decide to leave you in the most heartless of ways are those who are most beneficial to you as a person. Ironic right?
You see, I look back at all the tears I shed. And all the nights I stayed up crying, and hoping, and wishing. How I blamed everything on myself, and the only person to blame was the other person at the end of the spectrum. I beat myself up over something that I wasn’t deserved of. I took everything I had inside me, and I threw it back at myself. I ended up being toxic to my own self because of someone simply not caring about me like I thought they did.
Now I could go on and on about how hurt I may have been. Or how people aren’t who you think they are. But I’m not going to do that. I spent so long caring, so long looking over someone who just didn’t see it at all. Who still doesn’t see it. And although that’s still the case, my own personal self will not be put on the line for someone who ultimately won’t do the same back.
Because as much as you want to ‘save’ a person. As much as you want to make sure they’re okay, you have to think, “am I destroying myself by doing this?” And in my case, the answer was, and still is, yes.
Sometimes you’ve got to take a step back and let people live their lives for themselves. As much as you want to watch over them. As much as you deeply long to care. Because if they mess up, it’s okay. People mess up. Find comfort in knowing that you’ll be there for them when they’re ready for you love and care, and when you’re ready to give them that.
Bottom line: don’t put yourself on the line for someone who wouldn’t do the same for you. Give that love to someone else, but don’t be heartless about it- nor naive. Find comfort in your own self to know what you want- and most importantly, what you need.
Love and happiness always,
xo, Becca
I definitely needed this right now! Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!! It’s like I almost needed permission to feel good again, without him.
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oh my god, this exactly what i am going through, thank you for sharing and making me feel less insane. XX
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Such a good read, thanks for this post x
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You’re so right! It’s easy to get caught up caring about others and then pay so little attention to yourself 🌟
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I totally agree with this! It’s so hard to see at the time, but it’s not worth put yourself through all the heartache and stress when they’d never do it for you!!
PaleGirlRambling xo
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This works with so many different relationships – romantic or otherwise. Sometimes you just have to let people carry on doing what they’re doing, and look after yourself!
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I love this post so deeply – it’s so true and genuine but as easily this is said, it sure isn’t as easy to actually do it. xx Solange | creativepineapples.blogspot.com
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I’ve done this so many times and I’ve learned the hard way, now I’m careful who I let in and who I do things for.
Tasha x
http://itsatashathing.blogspot.co.uk/2017/02/21st-birthday-haul.html?m=1
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You have a great way of words, I just love your writing!! You are so right!! xoz
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You’re so right Becca! I’ve gone through things like this and taken it out on myself so much, I just had to learn. Xo
Ellieslittleeworld.wordpress.com
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This is so true! You have to prioritise your own happiness before others who wouldn’t do the same for you xx
BeautyBlitzBlog.com
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It’s crazy but i have the same thoughts again and again!!I can’t agree more with you!!Like you said,for some reason i always choose to be with people who obviously have different needs and wants with the hope that i will “save” them or that they will change eventually!!I should make a reminder for myself that sometimes it’s okay to put myself as a priority
xx Aphrodite ~ BubblyBeauty
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You’re so right. Self care is SO important, and as hard it is to step away from others sometimes you need to put your own wellbeing first. Great post!
http://Www.atartanrose.com
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Lovely post! Always put self care first ❤️ Xo
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This so true, I learnt this the hard way too but I’m glad you’ve found this too! x
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A lot of us can relate to this because people learn things from experience and somehow we all have or have had some kind of relationship and questioned ourselves. This is such a wonderful post. Thanks for sharing Becca! 🙂
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Wonderful read !! Thanks for sharing. Also if you have time please read http://fireinyoursoul.in/2017/02/20/motivational-side-of-caring/
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I swear you write the most beautiful quotes Becca! Loved this as always x
Morgan // http://www.justmorgs.com
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